Tag: people

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unashamed

alyssapebbles

Those who look to him are radiant;

There faces are never covered with shame.

~Psalm 34:5

Since I have decided to follow Christ with my life, I have been inexplicably drawn to people who seem to know Him, and I mean really know Him. The people that have that glint in their eye as they speak about Him, as though He is their most intimate and truest friend.

I have known very few people who have this kind of relationship with Him, but when I meet them and get to know them, I know that I want what they have. I want to know Him like that- like a best friend and ever-present companion, like someone who is always so close and so near that I can feel Him breathing through my lungs. The people who know Him like that are not ashamed of Him- they can do nothing but exude His presence in the lives of those around them; it emits from their very being. They are always thinking about Him and talking about Him- and talking to Him. They are so deeply in love with Him.

It should not be unusual to meet people like this, especially in the church. But it is.

How many people do you really know who completely lay down their lives for Him, who live and breathe His breath? Who constantly meditate on His word, and continually abide in His presence? I know very few.

My question is: why are we ashamed of Christ?

Why are we afraid to seem “overly spiritual” or even perhaps crazy to people who don’t know Him? What are we to gain by stifling His spirit in us?

In modern, Western culture Christianity, it is okay to go to church and be involved serving in the body of Christ, so long as you don’t offend others with your faith. It is okay as long as you don’t weird people out with your relationship to the Lord by talking to Him or being led by the Spirit in certain ways that people don’t understand. As a result, we’ve discouraged personal relationship. We’ve encouraged public testimony and appearing a certain way. But we’ve forgotten the whole point: Christ.

We’ve forgotten the whole reason we signed up for this thing in the first place; all this pain and sacrifice and dying to self. It’s all because of Him, and if we weren’t in love with Him, we would never go through all this. If our faith is not motivated by love for Christ, but instead becomes a way to make ourselves look good, we are lost. When we judge our brothers and sisters for the way God manifests Himself in their lives, as though He can only work in one way, we lose our own connection to Him.

We have to stop trying to please people. We have to stop expecting our relationship to look the same as anybody else’s. The Creator of the Universe loves each of us in unique and wildly different ways. He gave us passions and interests and joys and fears, and He knows what makes each one of us tick. He loves it when we delight in Him, when we enjoy Him- because He enjoys us. When we begin to truly get to know Him, we unlock His heart. We can begin to understand the magnitude of His love for us, and it will absolutely overwhelm us.

Let’s not forget who our First and Last is, and let’s never let fear of what other people think cause us to be ashamed of Him.

He is not ashamed of us.

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anchor

alyssapebbles

I get so lost in groups of people. I can so easily forget who I am and mold into whoever I am with, become what they want me to be.

I have a hard time holding my own- being confident in who God made me to be and being my true self in all situations. I know I’m not alone in this.

God’s put me in a place where I am constantly surrounded by people- I live in a house with people that are part of a larger community where I work, and my job is to be around large groups of people. It can feel really exhausting when I don’t know where I stand with others and am constantly trying to seek my worth in others. People-pleasing is the most tiresome work.

Don’t get me wrong: people are affirming and kind and loving and supportive. So many people have spoken into my life here and I have seen transformation in myself because of it- but people cannot be my only source of affirmation.

First and foremost, I must get that affirmation from God, and God alone. He alone knows me inside and out:

You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before  word is on my tongue you, Lord, know it completely. ~Psalm 139:1-4

God knows the deep ache in my soul in a way that no one else ever will- He knows all the conflicting feelings and pain and confusing thoughts that run through my head. He knows exactly what I need, even (and especially) when I don’t. People can’t know that.

I’m reading a great book called Boundaries by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend, two Christians who understand the importance of setting boundaries for ourselves, especially in the church where those boundaries can become so muddled in the name of good Christian servanthood- denying yourself and taking up your cross. They talk about when we need stronger boundaries and when we need to loosen our boundaries. As someone who has problems setting boundaries with others and getting sucked into life-draining situations that I never intended to be in, I am so refreshed to read their words and take ownership of my own life, which God has called me to steward. He allows things into our lives not to defeat us, but to challenge and call us to action, both in His strength and the strength He gives us. I don’t want to be a victim to my circumstances, floating around with no anchor.

People will always have expectations of you, but you cannot let disappointing them stop you from being you. You have to get your worth from God alone- He will tell you who you are and you will be able to rest in Him if you continually go back to Him as your source of worth. He will use people in your life to speak through, but people are fallible and simply human. No one knows what you truly need but Him.

Get quiet and listen to what He’s saying. His words are life.

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community

alyssapebbles

As I am plunged into this new and vibrant community, I am reminded of why God holds community, communion, so dear. Without community- without people around us intentionally and adamantly pursuing our hearts and our growth, and people that we in turn can support and love- we cannot experience the true love of Christ.

com·mun·ion
kəˈmyo͞onyən/
noun
  1. 1.
    the sharing or exchanging of intimate thoughts and feelings, especially when the exchange is on a mental or spiritual level. ~Dictionary.com

Coming from a huge faith community in Seattle where I could hide behind anonymity if I so wished, this experience has been rather jarring. The accountability that comes with a smaller circle of believers has already made me question the decisions that I make and the motives in my heart.

There is no hiding here.

As someone who likes to run away from her problems (California–>Seattle–>California, you get the gist), coming into a place where everyone already knows my name is weird. People can see me here. It reminds me of where I grew up- the smallness that sometimes felt suffocating- and the desire to escape it. Oh, I hid back then. Hiding is so much easier than being known.

But what I’ve found here is not like where I grew up. The community is welcoming, embracing, and loving. I have already felt pursued and reaffirmed that this is where I am supposed to be. I know this place will hold me to a higher standard, and in doing so will bring out the very best in me. That’s what a good community does- stays with you through thick and thin, and helps you hold on when you can no longer do so by yourself.

Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. ~Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

The teaching at my new and beloved church yesterday was precisely this: we cannot do this alone. As much as I have cultivated my independence over the last few years, buying into the individualistic culture our society tells us good and right, I know that I was not made for aloneness. Love can only be perfected when it is practiced, and it cannot be practiced alone. We need others to find fulfillment and lasting satisfaction- we will never be happy on our own, because we weren’t created that way. We are made for relationship, first and foremost with Christ, but also with our brothers and and sisters in Christ:

Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as  yourself.’ ~Matthew 22:37-39

I never thought I would be living in community again, but God had other plans (as He usually does). I can’t wait to see how He uses this year to continue to shape me into the person He wants me to become, and uses me to speak into the lives of others. I feel utterly privileged and amazed at His providence in my life.

I don’t deserve the incredible people that God has surrounded me with, but I accept them as gifts from the good Giver who sees me, knows me, and loves me.